Growing up in the 90's conjures up some fond memories (Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, Jerry Springer, Walkmans, Nintendo 64, Gel-Pens, Tamagotchi's, and THE BEST CARTOONS EVER) and some not so fond memories (bad makeup, (Youtube really has really done you youngsters a huge favor), horrible hairstyles, and a few fashion hell noooooooos! I'm now 26 years old which isn't that old, but for some of you teenagers let me clarify:
I'm at the age where I'd rather sit in the house and watch a good series on Netflix than go out and get "wasted." I prefer wine over hard liquor and I actually read the ingredients listed on the food I purchase. If I'm out past 2am, productivity for the next day is a no-go, and I'm in mandatory recovery mode for the next two day. Yet, I'm young enough to know how to dab, jig, and use terminology like "It's lit." I can work my own phone, computer, and tablet. But most importantly I'm an ambassador for the flower headband on SnapChat!
Often times young girls look at women my age and think that we have it made. But truth is, I've made a lot of mistakes. Some avoidable and others well, let's just say I'm "learning." And, because I was hanging out with my teenage cousin this weekend, I figured I’d share with you a few things I wish I’d known growing up.
- You're Beautiful! Don't agonize over your looks. Those women that you look up to in magazines are not perfect. No one is perfect. Girls on the covers of magazines are carefully airbrushed. Every frown line, pimple, blemish, tooth, hair, you name it are Photoshopped to perfection! They were made that way to make you feel unpretty and kill your self-esteem. Why? Because you're vulnerable and they want you to feel like you need their makeup, their clothes, and all their products to be "cool." Don't fall for it, you're fine the way you are.
- Don't Rush Into Adulthood. Yes having your own car and your own place may seem very cool, but trust me, you don't want these problems. Responsibilities are not cool and bills are not fun. I mean, lets take bills for example; YOU have to pay them; every month; on time!!!! You have to prioritize. Shoes or lights? Club or Cable? Internet or a trip to the Caribbean's? Ride the mommy and daddy wagon as long as you can. TRUST ME!
- Boys are boys. You will get your heartbroken and you'll get over it. Listen Linda, listen, listen...boys your age are very immature and scientifically take longer to mature than women. There's a very high probability that the big head little boy that you're dating now is NOT going to be your husband. You can draw as many hearts and hang around him as long as you want, but truth is, your relationship might not make it. This is normal. Hell yeah it'll hurt (if and when you guys break-up) but know that this is not the end of the world. You will make it through. Stop being dramatic. Years from now you will laugh about how madly in love you were with this boy. PS: If you're going through a breakup keep yourself busy. Avoid his social circle and his social media as much as possible. I promise you, you don't wanna know what he's doing.
- Your parents really do have your best interest at heart. Yes they understand what you're going through; no their experiences are not any different from yours; and no they are not trying to ruin your life. Parents really do want what's best for you. Listen to them..
- Get rid of the Negative Nancy's. As a teenager you will learn that there are two types of friends. The ones that will inspire you and encourage you to be the best person you can be. And the ones that will keep you in mess and drama. Get rid of the negativity. Like today.
- Don't Rush To Lose Your Virginity. Contrary to popular belief, not all of your friends are having sex like they claim. Most of them are boasting, so don't feel pressured to give yourself a deadline to lose your virginity. It's a big deal. You will forever remember losing your virginity. If you give it up too soon and to the wrong person you will REGRET IT forever. The first time isn't even all that great or orgasmic as you think anyways. Its actually quite awkward and uncomfortable. WAIT as long as you can.
- Be Yourself. Everyone else is taken. There's nothing more dope than a girl with her own personality. Don’t imitate anyone else. It's ok to be different. Just do you and the rest will follow.
Peace. Love. Blessings.